Broken Promises?

Promise - a declaration that one will do or refrain from doing something specified.

How many of us can live up to our promises? Not many I guess. Usually broken/forgotten promises leave us feeling very angry and bitter. That's why I dislike to give any promises casually. And if I happen to promise anyone, I will make sure I live up to it, by hook or by crook. It's do or die.

However now, I thought of a whole new perspective of promises. Maybe, if anyone has ever "broken" or "forgotten" their promises made to you, it does not mean that they have cleanly forgotten about whatever they have said. But rather, the promise is buried deep down in their hearts and they can no longer live up to the promise because sadly, the promise has already expired.

How many times have you promised to "love someone forever"? But somehow or rather you did not end up doing it, but yet, the issue keeps bugging you? You will realize probably as time goes by and when things fall apart, you are no longer in the position to live up to the promise anymore. So all you can do is to keep that promise in your heart. You have not forgotten, you have just lost the chance to carry out the promise.

"So, what ever happened to your promise?"

When Loving Means Telling.

There are basically two types of people in the world: the active and the passive.

Without a doubt, the active fights for whatever they want, even in the context of love. They see someone they like, they pursue him/her and maybe win him/her in the end. However if it turns out unsuccessful, they would pick themselves up and console themselves that, possibly in the future they might meet someone more suitable and compatible for them. Fast, quick and no hesitation. That's how the actives act.

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On the other hand, the passive waits for things to happen. They love to be in their comfort zone and waiting has become a habit for them. If they see someone they like, they wait, and they wait. That's all they do. And they all hoping that maybe one day, the person he/she likes would miraculously discover their love. However, this is often not the case. So why do passives still wait and mope? This is because they are afraid of the word R-E-J-E-C-T-I-O-N. However, there is nothing to be afraid of, like the quote says, "There is one in the world for everybody." The person who rejected you might not be the right one for you, that's all.

Just by expressing your love will not hurt. If under some circumstances and for some reasons, they can't accept your love. Just be happy that in this lifetime, you have experienced what it is like to feel your heart flutter or to smile dreamily like a fool. And at the same time, you let him/her feel thankful that in this whole wide world, there is someone who acknowledges and appreciates their existence. So even if it don't work out, from the big picture, it is actually a win win situation.

Sometimes, it's now or never. Don't let the opportunity slip by. Because the one you love, can't read your mind. So this goes out to all my friends out there (many of them in fact) who are passive and pessimistic! I know it's easier said than done, because I'm a passive person as well. But I will try to change. Will you?

Tell Me Why.

Was randomly looking through my past and current photos. Noticed minor but significant changes in myself. I think I have lost the sparkle in my smile and the passion for life. I used to look bright eyed and sincerely happy. Now, my smiles are more tamed and reserved. I wonder why. Is it because the years have worn me out? Or is it part and parcel of growing up?

Looking back, I'm really glad that those good times were captured in the photos. But at the same time, I miss those days terribly. If only I could have one more day, just one more day, I would make sure I savor each moment of my life.

Remnants of the past.

Maybe it's our destiny

Just watched Slumdog Millionaire and I would say it is pretty decent. But I had mixed feelings after the movie. I am happy that I'm not (hopefully never) thrown into those dire situations, and at the same time, I felt really sad for Jamal because of all the misfortune that fell upon him.

Why would anyone in this world have to go through such trials and tribulations? How could anyone ever overcome them? From the movie, I found the answer. It is basically: Sheer Determination. Never once did he give up, especially when he was looking for Latika in that overly populated India.

In the past, I used to be a quitter and it don't take much for me to throw in the towel and walk away. But over the years, I've learnt that giving up means regrets in the future. Why not give it a shot, fight for it. Because in life, sometimes it is now or never. Once you choose to give up on the opportunities, you may lose them forever. Therefore, this movie inspired me and further emphasize on why I should hold on when the going gets tough. Whatever that don't kill you, makes you stronger. I WILL AND SHALL BE STRONG! =)

If no one gives in, both have to give up.

You've Caught Me

First it was a five course dinner at Yoke Hotel and a surprise visit to your house to see the meticulous and very beautiful decorations in your room. I was swept away.

I was very amazed and pleasantly surprised by your effort put in today. Everything was basically flawless. I was awed by the amount of hard work you put in. It was really unexpected from a person like you. HA.

I guess you are slowly beginning to win me over bit by bit.

Guess I'm Doing Fine.

Beck - Guess I'm doing fine

Theres a blue bird at my window

I cant hear the songs he sings

All the jewels in heaven

They dont look the same to me

I just wade the tides that turned

Till I learn to leave the past behind

Its only lies that Im living

Its only tears that Im crying

Its only you that Im losing

Guess Im doing fine

All the battlements are empty

And the moon is laying low

Yellow roses in the graveyard

Got no time to watch them grow

Now I bade a friend farewell

I can do whatever pleases me

Its only lies that Im living

Its only tears that Im crying

Its only you that Im losing

Guess Im doing fine

Press my face up to the window

To see how warm it is inside

See the things that Ive been missing

Missing all this time

Its only lies that Im living

Its only tears that Im crying

Its only you that Im losing

Guess Im doing fine

"How are you doing?" "Guess I'm doing fine."

What does it takes?

Sometimes, whenever I look at the situation my sis is in now, it reminded me so much about myself and my past.

The same kind of betrayal, the same kind of suffering and pain, the same kind of longing, the same kind of ambiguity and the same kind of hope.

But luckily for her, she is less harsh and more initiative. While he is more courageous and determined? And hopefully every step they take, it will bring them back together.

Therefore, whenever I look back, I hate myself for being harsh and passive and hate him for being cowardly and for losing faith. Why? I ask myself all the time. So many questions, I need an answer. It could have been, would have been, might have been. But it didn't, and I guess we only got ourselves to blame.

Ok, enough about myself. It's already a lost cause. On a brighter note, I sincerely and genuinely wish that things will go well and eventually work out for my sis. I hope that she can prove to me that things will never be impossible and miracles do happen if you were to try. And lastly, I trust that my sis will be able to "help" me realize the dream which I never had a chance to. =)

Even-Out-Day

This morning I was so close to murdering Dr. Mac-Nail. If killing aint illegal, I would probably have done it in the fit of anger. Grr.. Luckily, Armstrong compensated the morning by being pretty decent. "When the going gets tough, the tough gets going! I can and I will do it!" Self Fulfilling Prophecy please work your magic on me!

Shopping with Sis and Mum after school, and my Mummy got me a Gc Guess Ladies Collection Watch. :) I just casually mentioned that the watch is nice. I have such a wonderful Mum. :D Thanks Mummy! I guess it's one of those eventful and uneventful days.

Make Me Smile.

Would you or Will you?

Thanks to Bee Gees (spit monster) , I recognize the fact that I have problems with my "Woulds" and "Wills". I think I should go back to grammer school. GRRR. Anyone kind enough to help me? =P Haha!

Unwind.

So many things to do, so little time. Ok, I promise to take only 2hours of nap!


Thank God for miracles.

Busier than a bumble bee.

So school has resumed yet again. This sem is gonna be overwhelming. 3 research papers and speeches coming up. "Hallelujah!" :( Ok for the whole of next 3 months or so, tuesdays and thursday will officially be my dreaded days of the week. (Who says ah mohs are nice? Inside joke.) Luckily I have fridays and the weekends to look forward to. Oh wells..

Anyways, today Germy had gotten me all paranoid about my secret purchase. Shhh! Let's just hope that everything will go smoothly and I would get my perfect purchase in the perfect condition within the estimated time. Then it will all be perfect! And i will return for MORE MORE purchases. :) So much for e-commerce in Com 125. Haha.